Saturday, 17 December 2011

2012 man-ifesto ¬ fashionspam adapted from gq

1. Never take drugs, talk about politics or go down on someone just to be polite.

2. It is better to beg forgiveness than to ask for permission.

3. Learn exactly how much you can drink without losing your temper, your wallet or your erection. Learn this as quickly as possible.

4. Pain is just weakness leaving the body.

5. It is good to remember lovers with affection. But dont get too sentimental or you will end up dragging the dead carcass of that relationship around the block one more time. But also, remember the bad times

6. It is always health to rememeber the bad times. When you are in a monogamous relationship, you will long for your promiscuous years. When you are living wild, you will get nostalgic for when there was someone waiting for you at home. But every life has its limitations and itd drawnbacks. So when you are free, remember how stifled you felt being in a relationship. And when you are settled, remember how unhappy promiscuity made you in the end. Always count your blessings of the here and now. And remember the bad times

7. It is much easier to break someone's jaw if their mouth is open. Your mouth should never be open unless you have something interesting to say.

8. The only success that matters is being able to live the life that you want. This does not mean that there will never be failure, disappointment or more work than you can handle. Living the life you want means you will still be regularly visited by all of these. And yet it will always be worth it.

9.You know that you are truly in love when you are shocked to be waking up without her by your side.

10. Eye contact. Eye contact with everyone. Eye contact and big smile. These small, good things will transform your world.

11. God wants everybody to be happy, even the assholes.

12. It takes guts to be gentle and kind.

13. Always treat your parents as if they were close friends who are soon to move to a distant impossible ever to return. Never take them for granted, no matter how busy life gets. You can't imagine your mother and father dying. And then they do.

14.A little of what you fancy will always do you good - unless what you fancy  is crack.

15. Prepare yourself for every task you face. Really prepare- you're too old to be doing your homework on the bus. When the time comes, be ready. As they say in boxking: train hard, fight easy.

16. NEVER BICKER WITH YOUR NEIGHBOURS, YOUR WORK COLLEAGUES OR YOUR GIRLFRIEND. Leave if you want. Go somewhere else. Find a new neighbour, job or girl. BUT NEVER BICKER.

17. THE BIG LIE: Everything happens for a reason.


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